What's Next for the VBK's

We've had a lot of people ask us what's next for our VBK family. We've had people ask if we were pregnant yet (because everyone that adopts gets pregnant, right?), if we're going to adopt again, if we will try infertility treatments, if we will look into foster care, etc.  

In all honesty, we don't know.

Right now, we are happy as a family of 3.  We are enjoying our little man and are so thankful for what God has done to make N a part of our lives.  For right now, we're content.

Have we talked about the future?  Of course.  It's hard not to.

Here's the "plan", which of course is probably a joke to God.  He always seems to have a different plan that what we thought.

Last year, when I went to the doctor, she suggested that I have a laparoscopy due to some pain that I was having, which she suspected was being caused by endometriosis.  This procedure had also been suggested when I went to the infertility specialists.  Right after I went to the doctor, we got the call about N and needless to say, having the procedure done never became a priority.  We're thinking that I might try to have it over the summer.  The procedure isn't horrible, but it's not fun, especially if they find endometriosis and remove some of it during the operation.  Will this help us to get pregnant?  We have no clue, but it could.  We would not be doing the operation to help us get pregnant, but rather to help me feel better.

Getting pregnant is not something that I honestly desire.  Getting pregnant would be the "easy" answer in how to build our family.  That sounds horrible, but it's the truth.  It's less expensive, less stressful, etc.  I know those of you that have been pregnant might disagree with me, but you would agree with me if  you've walked the road of adoption, where everything is in the hands of birthfamilies and lawyers, when you feel that you have no control over the situation.  You are at the mercy of the birthmother and her decisions, those after the birth and those involving the prenatal care of the baby.  You've held a baby that "could" be yours if she chooses adoption and you have to wait hours and days for her to sign the paperwork, all the time knowing that the baby that you are loving might not be a part of your family if she decides to parent.

We have talked about adopting again someday, but that's a scary thought.  Things went very smoothly with J.  She included us in her appointments and wanted us to be involved.  We were able to be at the hospital when N was born and we were blessed to be a part of everything that happened.  I was the first one to hold him and was even able to spend the first night with him and J in the hospital room.  She signed the paperwork without any issues and has treated us as his parents even before he was born.  In the world of adoption, N's adoption was very drama free.  That is what makes it so scary when it comes to considering adopting again.  We could end up having a failed match and going through all of those emotions.  Our next adoption could be soo different and that scares me.  Is it worth the scare?  Yes, but it is a lot to think about.

We have very briefly talked about foster care.  We just don't know if it's for us.  Maybe in a few years when N is older and our family is more established.  We're not saying no, just no for now.

So, where does this leave us?  Just happy to be the VBK 3 for now.  God had some awesome plans for us in 2010 and I look forward to what he has planned for us in 2011 and beyond.