So, I got home today (I worked extended and it was dark when I got home. :( yuck) and guess what had come in the mail?????
OUR COMPLETED AND NOTARIZED HOMESTUDY!!!!!!
It's official:
THE VBKS ARE OFFICIALLY PAPER PREGNANT!!!!!!
Friday, November 6, 2009
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Would it be wrong???
Would it be wrong to ask for money for our adoption/infertility instead of presents this year for Christmas? I have more than I could ever really need in most areas of my life, but could really use the money to get/achieve something that I desire more than anything in the world.
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
More than you want to know
I know this may be more than you want, or care, to know, but I totally cried today while on the phone. I am just overwhelmed by all that is going on.
Basically, within the last few days, we got an email from the SW about the February baby which opened the situation back up to us. So, we then had to figure out what we wanted to do.
I tried to call the attorney today to get more information since we have lots of questions, but they have already spoken with a couple that is most likely going to follow through with this Feb. baby. We will know by Friday whether they are a go or not. I'm okay with this, but at the same time, it's another closed door, and this time, we weren't the ones to close it.
I then called an adoption agency here in Jax and an adoption ministry that is nationwide. I can't begin to describe the fears and tears that came because of these calls. Yes, they were both very encouraging, but man, these decisions we are making are huge. Both are Christian related and it's nice to talk to people that believe that God is involved in all of this, but if you have never had to look into adoption, then you have no idea what all in entails. We're talking thousands of dollars, thousands and thousands of dollars, thousands upon thousands of dollars. I'm hoping to blog about this soon, but I will say this: ADOPTION IS NOT CHEAP IN ANY WAY!
God, please use this blog as a comfort to others going through this process, but also as an eye opener to those who have never had to think about looking for an adoption agency, those who have never waited for a long time for those two pink lines on a pregnancy test. Please let my words open their hearts and minds to understand that saying the words "Well, why don't you just adopt?" are horrible words to say if they do not know the truth about adoption.
Basically, within the last few days, we got an email from the SW about the February baby which opened the situation back up to us. So, we then had to figure out what we wanted to do.
I tried to call the attorney today to get more information since we have lots of questions, but they have already spoken with a couple that is most likely going to follow through with this Feb. baby. We will know by Friday whether they are a go or not. I'm okay with this, but at the same time, it's another closed door, and this time, we weren't the ones to close it.
I then called an adoption agency here in Jax and an adoption ministry that is nationwide. I can't begin to describe the fears and tears that came because of these calls. Yes, they were both very encouraging, but man, these decisions we are making are huge. Both are Christian related and it's nice to talk to people that believe that God is involved in all of this, but if you have never had to look into adoption, then you have no idea what all in entails. We're talking thousands of dollars, thousands and thousands of dollars, thousands upon thousands of dollars. I'm hoping to blog about this soon, but I will say this: ADOPTION IS NOT CHEAP IN ANY WAY!
God, please use this blog as a comfort to others going through this process, but also as an eye opener to those who have never had to think about looking for an adoption agency, those who have never waited for a long time for those two pink lines on a pregnancy test. Please let my words open their hearts and minds to understand that saying the words "Well, why don't you just adopt?" are horrible words to say if they do not know the truth about adoption.
Friday, October 30, 2009
It's been too long
It has been too long since I last updated the blog. Sorry about that, but we've been pretty busy.
Here's what's new with us:
Baby A is doing well and so is K. I've spoken with her and everything seems to be going pretty smoothly. Sad that Baby A won't be a part of our family, but very proud of K and her decision. My goal is to meet both of them either in November or December. Like I said when she was born, even though she's not officially a VBK, she will always hold a special place in my heart.
Like I said in the last post, we are super, super close to officially being paper pregnant. Once that happens, we're going to have to figure out what our next move is, but at least we are moving in the right direction. We've been looking into some adoption agencies, so we'll have to make some decisions on what to do next. With this blog, I hope to open the eyes of some people who are "fertile", who never have had to research adoption, agencies, or the cost. Some people think that it's so easy and if someone struggles with infertility, that it should be easy to adopt, but man, it's tough in so many ways. SOOO tough and I hope some eyes are opened with this blog, as well as it being used as a document of our journey.
We did turn down a baby that is going to be born in February. I came home this week to find an email from our homestudy lady with a possible baby situation. We aren't listed with an agency or anything, but she's been contacted with the situation and wanted us to look it over and let her know if we were interested. I can't really discuss it here on the web, but basically, it was WAY more money than what we wanted or had considered the norm from our research, and the situation itself was kind of shady. Maybe it would have worked out, but neither Dave or I felt at peace about moving on with the situation. It's hard, because we want a child, a person to make us officially a family, but I'm learning that we're going to have to make smart choices, and sometimes, those choices are hard. (More on the money issue in a later post.)
The day that we turned the situation down, I got on facebook to see that even more people are pregnant. Yes, I know that one day we will have a family, but it's hard for anyone in our situation to be happy about their long wait while lots don't even have to think about it. It's hard to understand and to me, that's the hardest thing. Why is so easy for some people and so hard for others? Why us? Why can't they find anything wrong, but yet, nothing happens? Are we being punished? Do I not love God enough? These are all some of the questions that go through my head. I know, for the most part, that most of these are silly questions, but after 5 years, it's hard not to ask those questions.
For now, it's time to go to bed. Air Force One is almost finished on tv and with the fall festival tomorrow, we'll need our rest. Goodnight all and thanks for reading through my rambling thoughts.
Here's what's new with us:
Baby A is doing well and so is K. I've spoken with her and everything seems to be going pretty smoothly. Sad that Baby A won't be a part of our family, but very proud of K and her decision. My goal is to meet both of them either in November or December. Like I said when she was born, even though she's not officially a VBK, she will always hold a special place in my heart.
Like I said in the last post, we are super, super close to officially being paper pregnant. Once that happens, we're going to have to figure out what our next move is, but at least we are moving in the right direction. We've been looking into some adoption agencies, so we'll have to make some decisions on what to do next. With this blog, I hope to open the eyes of some people who are "fertile", who never have had to research adoption, agencies, or the cost. Some people think that it's so easy and if someone struggles with infertility, that it should be easy to adopt, but man, it's tough in so many ways. SOOO tough and I hope some eyes are opened with this blog, as well as it being used as a document of our journey.
We did turn down a baby that is going to be born in February. I came home this week to find an email from our homestudy lady with a possible baby situation. We aren't listed with an agency or anything, but she's been contacted with the situation and wanted us to look it over and let her know if we were interested. I can't really discuss it here on the web, but basically, it was WAY more money than what we wanted or had considered the norm from our research, and the situation itself was kind of shady. Maybe it would have worked out, but neither Dave or I felt at peace about moving on with the situation. It's hard, because we want a child, a person to make us officially a family, but I'm learning that we're going to have to make smart choices, and sometimes, those choices are hard. (More on the money issue in a later post.)
The day that we turned the situation down, I got on facebook to see that even more people are pregnant. Yes, I know that one day we will have a family, but it's hard for anyone in our situation to be happy about their long wait while lots don't even have to think about it. It's hard to understand and to me, that's the hardest thing. Why is so easy for some people and so hard for others? Why us? Why can't they find anything wrong, but yet, nothing happens? Are we being punished? Do I not love God enough? These are all some of the questions that go through my head. I know, for the most part, that most of these are silly questions, but after 5 years, it's hard not to ask those questions.
For now, it's time to go to bed. Air Force One is almost finished on tv and with the fall festival tomorrow, we'll need our rest. Goodnight all and thanks for reading through my rambling thoughts.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Saying NO and Paper Pregnant
Thank you so much for your prayers and thoughts.
We basically got an email about a possibe situation with a baby being born in February. When I first got the email, I basically wanted to do the happy dance, but the longer I thought about it, the less at peace I felt. Because of the circumstances in this situation, we have said no. It pains me to do this, since I feel like I am passing up on what I want most, which is a baby, but I just think we'd be getting ourselves into a lot of debt and unneeded drama. Oh, how I just want to say yes!
In other news, as soon as two letters arrive at the social workers office and the official paperwork gets typed up, we will be completely finished with our homestudy!!!!!! We will be what the adoption world calls "Paper Pregnant".
We basically got an email about a possibe situation with a baby being born in February. When I first got the email, I basically wanted to do the happy dance, but the longer I thought about it, the less at peace I felt. Because of the circumstances in this situation, we have said no. It pains me to do this, since I feel like I am passing up on what I want most, which is a baby, but I just think we'd be getting ourselves into a lot of debt and unneeded drama. Oh, how I just want to say yes!
In other news, as soon as two letters arrive at the social workers office and the official paperwork gets typed up, we will be completely finished with our homestudy!!!!!! We will be what the adoption world calls "Paper Pregnant".
Monday, October 26, 2009
Prayers Needed
OH...I need your prayers. I've got so much to say and post on the blog, but just now, I got an email about a possible adoption situation. (And no, it does not involve baby A) Can I just say WOW??????? Please pray! Can't give any information at the moment.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Baby A has arrived
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