Time is Ticking Away

You may have noticed that I added a few new things on the left side of my blog, two for those being "tickers."  One is counting the time that has passed since we completed our home study and the other counting the time that has passed since we turned our official profile into the local agency here in Jax.  

Wow-As of today, we've had our home study completed for exactly two months and we've had our profile at the agency for exactly three weeks.  :)

What is crazy is that it feels like forever and I mean that in all honesty.  When I first put up the second ticker, I thought I was going crazy.  I double checked my phone log to check the date to make sure.  I feel as if it's been three months, not three weeks.  I know that it will all happen in due time, that we will receive a wonderful call one day that either a baby is waiting for us or that we are matched, but I'm learning that I'm not very patient at all!!!!!

I know that if we decided to get pregnant today (well, maybe not us, but a very fertile couple), it still might be weeks before the timing was right or until e those two pink lines would appear on a pregnancy test.  If we got pregnant today, we would still have to wait nine months before the baby arrived.

I think what it comes down to...is control.

With our own bodies, we have some control.  Obviously, for Dave and I, things just aren't happening as the textbooks would say, but for many, they can choose at what time they want to get pregnant (or at least a timeframe) or for the most part, prevent it from happening (Dave and I are pros at this).  Knowing that we not only have to wait for a pregnant mother to contact the agency, but then to have to pick our profile out of the all of the others that she sees, makes me realize that I have pretty much NO control.  I'm having to depend upon God and trust that His plan is the right one, even though it may not be the one that we think or "fit" into our timeframe.