Tuesday Update

Just wanted to give you guys a quick update to let you know that we still haven't made a decision.  This isn't something that is an easy decision or one that is clear cut.  It's a risk either way.

If we move forward with this adoption, we risk losing the money if she decides to parent.  If this happens, we will not be able to pursue adoption/fertility treatments for a few years while we pay off the loan for the adoption.  This makes me weep just thinking about spending more years without the possibility of kids.

If we don't move forward with this adoption, we could possibly be turning down a situation that we were meant to move forward with.  We risk not having a son in March and possibly, not getting the opportunity to adopt for years to come.  Because birth mothers now have the right to choose the adoptive couple, we have no guarantee, unless we go with international adoption.

There's a big part of me that wants to fight for this baby boy, but I'm just so scared.

We have made the decision that we want to meet with the attorney again before we decide, so I plan on calling her tomorrow.

Of course, there's a lot more to this situation than what I have written on this blog or plan to write on this blog.  I know that many of you have emailed me, facebook messaged me, or commented on this blog and I want to answer your questions.  I love knowing that you guys are praying for us and are thinking about us.  I do plan on writing you back and/or answering some of those questions here on the blog, but it's been a long day today.  I'll try to answer those on Thursday since Wednesday is my REALLY long day.